Tips For Ending A Long-Term Relationship
It hurts you to admit it, but your long-term relationship seems to have reached its end. Long-term relationships are subjective concerning their duration. Some individuals perceive long-term to be a period above five years, while other couples who have been together for a year consider what they have as a long-term relationship.
There may have been times in your relationship where the other party attempts to initiate the breakup, but for some reason, they always fail to see it through. You decide that its best to end the relationship yourself, and you’re wondering the best way possible to do this. Breakups aren’t meant to be messy experiences all the time, which is why this guide has been created.
If you’re seeking to get out of your relationship, but have no clue as to how to go about it, we will be showing you how in this article. This piece is the ultimate guide which will protect your self-esteem and dignity throughout the process.
1. Set Realistic Expectations
This was not a fling; it was an actual relationship that lasted for a very long time. In most cases, ending such a commitment proves to be harder than one would think. There are three main stages in a breakup conversation. It begins with the preparation towards that dreaded conversation, the process of ending the relationship, and the period after the breakup has happened. Each stage takes you on a roller coaster of emotions which can be very draining. The feelings you encounter exist only because you are leaving someone you know for the unknown. In instances where the other person isn’t expecting it, breakup conversations can be more difficult for your partner. It is better to go in fully prepared with realistic expectations for how the breakup conversation will play out.
2. Keep Your Cool
No matter how the situation pans out, it is best to remain calm, and not give in to anger or hatred. Breakups are caused by a large number of things, either from your or your significant other. No matter who was at fault, a conversation about ending the relationship shouldn’t get you on the offensive. At best, have such a conversation when your calm, as this allows to show respect to each other. The ability to be mature about a breakup ensures that no matter what, your relationship ends gracefully, with no one pushing blame or yelling at the other. Remain reasonable and calm with your words and actions, always.
3. Be Honest
The reason for ending your long-term relationship must be stated during your conversation. Being honest, though crucial, doesn’t mean that you have to be mean. As much as possible, be truthful to your partner about why you think the relationship didn’t work. The problem could have come from the lack of physical connection between you both or the fact that you both wanted different things in life. While being honest, you must try to make mention of all the things you appreciated about them, so as not to turn the conversation into an attack. Using cliché lines on your partner solves nothing, but instead, leaves them wondering what they did wrong.
4. Remain Firm In Your Position
The trickiest part of every breakup is confrontation and argument, on whether you’ll regret your decision later. In many instances, your partner may argue with you or beg for you to have a change of heart. In extreme cases, some individuals may leave even before the conversation is over. No matter how your discussion turns out, you must resolve to stand firm in your reasoning, not allowing your mind to be changed or persuaded. During such tough moments, where you may be tempted to act regretful, remember the reasons why you initiated the breakup and remain firm in them.
5. Plan The Future
Now that the relationship has been officially brought to an end, you must talk about the future and set some guidelines you will both agree on. All the instructions must be such that booty calls, drunken texts, and the changing of minds are strongly prohibited. Making such decisions ensures that you both remain happy and will also help both of you make a clean break. If it is possible, both of you can decide to stay friends or not. Depending on your emotional strength, this decision might hold you back from moving on. Thus, you need to be true to yourself before agreeing on becoming friends after your breakup.
6. Make Efforts To Heal
Life after a breakup may become a tale of rebounds and one-night stands. Most often, such activities leave you worse than you were before. As much as possible, avoid jumping into new relationships, no matter how tempting it may be. Use the time after your breakup to analyze your past relationship, figuring out what went wrong, the lessons learned, and what you wish to see in your future partner. Periods after a breakup must be used for personal reflection, to identify your shortcomings and work on improving future relationships and yourself. Do things that make you happy, be it sports, meditation, cooking, or hanging out with friends.
It doesn’t matter how long you have been in your relationship, one thing remains true; you can end it amicably without any fights and hard feelings. Before having the breakup conversation, be sure to reflect deeply on what to say, how it must be said as well as how well the other person will take the news. Be vocal without attacking your significant other and stand your ground, no matter how affected they are about the situation.
Going your separate ways can be helpful for both of you. Breakups help you to improve as an individual and also as a partner; thus, you must try your possible best to make use of this time for your benefit. This article has taken you through a step by step guide to help you get out of any long-term relationship. It helps you to protect your dignity through to the end and also to move on amicably with no hard feelings on either side.